Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
