so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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