i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
