i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
