Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
