1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
We have so much sex to catch up on
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
