David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
