On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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