She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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