Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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