"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My pussy is not your playground.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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