we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
