But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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