i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
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Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
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I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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