At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
