Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I wear drunk well.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
