We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
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i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
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See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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