i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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