Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
