Got a toothbrush?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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