She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
