Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(647): View more from Ontario

Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.

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(813): View more from Florida

watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide

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(641): View more from Iowa

Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.

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(562): View more from California

or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.

(1-423): View more from Tennessee

I honestly don't know what to make of that.

(423): View more from Tennessee

A ham sandwich would be nice.

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(425): View more from Washington

Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?

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(360): View more from Washington

Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.

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(330): View more from Ohio

test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.

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