I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Randomize
