direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
