I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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