omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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