i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
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i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
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He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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