I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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