I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
