Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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