Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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