There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
