So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize