Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
