we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
