ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize