wake up i wanna do it froggy style
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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