Do you still have your period?
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Randomize
