just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
