it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
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