We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize