Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize