So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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