Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
