I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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