i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
