my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
