at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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