I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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