A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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