I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
