You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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